Episode 2 - Mr Shiny

When I joined the online dating site, all I wanted was a user
friendly site that I could cruise around on, and wouldn’t cost me my left arm.
I’ve made friends on forums and various other places online before so I knew how
easy it would be to talk to people. 

The interesting part is the initial response. Flirtations flying
about, a plethora of men and loads of people to browse through with pics. This
is where, of course, the first thing can go wrong. As we all may well know,
anyone, at any time, can post a fake picture. This is obviously the number one
rule. Add to this, a profile that seems great, you want to believe the photo
could be real. I’m using my real one.
 
So when you find there on screen, what sounds too wonderful...
well he probably is. For the purpose of my first story and to keep what little
I know about him a secret, I’m going to call him Mr Shiny, for that is how he
appeared. He had the credentials, he ticked all the boxes and our banter was
fun and flirtatious... I had an internet crush. Not the first time... will it
be the last?
 
He took my number after prolonged internet dating and we had
several get to know calls before arranging to meet. Now I wondered at this
point why his voice didn’t seem to match... didn’t quite fit. So, after several
days of zero communication, I was supposed to hear from him about the time to
meet after he finished work. Needless to say I heard not a thing. Silence
followed a very long session on the phone. 

Now in the age of internet and text messages I spend less time
talking on the phone. I still like to do it but why call when you can say it in
text, so a long phone conversation is rare but encouraging. Day and place set
then... nothing. I still to this day, over a month later, have no idea what
happened. He was probably married and looking for a shag on the side. Who knows
but I should have thought it weird when he was reluctant to exchange details
but happy to take mine... so my first flirtation came to a screaming halt. 
 
A little disheartened, I decided there was more than one guy on
the site. Perhaps I could give it another go... think again.

Episode 3 - Mr Hard Up and The Married Man

There has been an update since my last entry. It seems Mr Shiny
hasn’t fallen into a black hole or isn’t in traction after an unfortunate road
accident but is cruising the site again for his next victim. I have still
received no word. Not a sorry for the silence, or acknowledgement of my message
which read, hey what gives? No explanation. Perhaps he is being nice and doesn’t
want to hurt my feelings. Um, it is too late, you’re silence and rejection
did sting. Be a man and at least say, sorry I stood you up, you’re not what
I’m looking for. This is still a mystery but I guess I have to accept the
fact that I was rejected... for whatever reason. Thankfully I am resilient
and I bounce back... until the next time anyway...

So I continued on with the site even though my first interaction
went sour. While I had been communicating with Mr Shiny I came across two other
contenders who seemed interested. The first was the married man. At first I
didn’t realise this to be the case. I learned quickly after this to check the
status before investing any of my time. He attempted to dazzle me with poetry
and sweet flattering words. When I learned he was married this only intensified
his pursuit and how much he wanted to meet me.

Now, before we go on, I must get one thing very straight. I don’t
want to be the other woman. There are several reasons for this. The number one
being that I couldn’t do that to someone. I couldn’t knowingly conduct a sordid
affair with another woman’s husband. I have standards. I have morals. I don’t
want to be the cause of someone being hurt. Perhaps if he was the ‘perfect’ guy
I may break my morality and attempt some sort of relationship but I’m not
immoral and I don’t like him enough so the point is moot. He continues to pursue
and boost my ego and I continue to play hard to get... because in this instance, 
I am. It’s flattering and sometimes he’s sweet but it isn’t enough to make
me ignore my judgement.

The other is quite simple. I don’t like to share. I could blame
this again on being an only child but I won’t. You see, envy is one of many sins
I am guilty of. I don’t like the idea that the object of my affection is sharing
this affection with someone else. The green eyed monster comes out and I become
this totally different person, and I don’t like when she escapes. So basically
The Married Man was disregarded before I even started.

So this brings me to Mr Hard Up. Now why am I calling him this?
Good question. And one I’ll answer in a moment but first, if I’ve learnt
anything from my experience on the dating site it is this, the men are
either:

Married, admitting they are and state quite freely they are after an affair
Are married and don’t admit it but are quite freely looking for  an affair.
Pretend to be someone they aren’t.
Are single but is only looking for a booty call.
They aren’t attractive.
Now I realise this sounds very judgemental of me and
I know I’m not going to win Miss Universe or I’m not 25
but there has to be an attraction no matter how nice they are. If I couldn’t
kiss them, then I can’t date them.
Then there are the men who are seeking a relationship, are what
they portray, aren’t unattractive and are seeking the same as me.
But I think these are the ones that are harder to find.
As yet I haven’t met anyone on the site (besides Mr Shiny the con artist)
that I could truly say, yes this could lead to something.
I don’t think I will be finding my soul mate on the internet. I’m still waiting to be
surprised.

Anyway, Mr Hard Up, he seemed like the last point. Genuine,
nice guy who is searching for love. As it turned out, he was after the 
booty.

I didn’t know this at first. I had lunch with him but there was 
no spark. I couldn’t imagine kissing him. It wasn’t that he was
unattractive... just not my type.

I have a single friend who I have been going on all these
adventures with. Online dating, speed dating and the
like... and I thought perhaps they would hit it off. How wrong could I be? As
soon as he found out he wouldn’t get the booty from her, he ran for the hills
before deciding to give it one last go with me. Suffice to say, I no longer
am in contact!

My friend also organised a date with one of these
guys. He turned out to be pretending to be something he wasn’t. Thankfully
she spotted him before going to meet him. The funniest thing about this is...
that he actually thought it would be OK that he wasn’t what she thought he
would be. He was at least 20 years older than he said and wasn’t as he
portrayed at all. So he turns up knowing he has lied and didn’t think she
would reject him! All very strange. She has decided she won't find her soul
mate on the internet.

I was ready after the three strikes to say, it is time to give up
on the online dating. Since then, in the last two weeks I
have been communicating with a seemingly nice man. We have been chatting in a
friendly way with no talk of meeting or exchanging numbers but rather
building a friendship slowly over time. I’m not sure where I want this to go,
if anywhere, but it has renewed my faith in the kind of men on the site. I’m
having a pleasant exchange with what could become a new friend. Time will
tell with this one.

Next week I will delve into the world of Speed Dating and my foray into this world with Mr TV.

Episode 2 – Mr Shiny 


When I joined the online dating site, all I wanted was a user
friendly site that I could cruise around on, and wouldn’t cost me my left arm.
I’ve made friends on forums and various other places online before so I knew how
easy it would be to talk to people.



The interesting part is the initial response. Flirtations flying
about, a plethora of men and loads of people to browse through with pics. This
is where, of course, the first thing can go wrong. As we all may well know,
anyone, at any time, can post a fake picture. This is obviously the number one
rule. Add to this, a profile that seems great, you want to believe the photo
could be real. I’m using my real one.



So when you find there on screen, what sounds too wonderful...
  well he probably is. For the purpose of my first story and to keep what little
  I know about him a secret, I’m going to call him Mr Shiny, for that is how he
  appeared. He had the credentials, he ticked all the boxes and our banter was
  fun and flirtatious... I had an internet crush. Not the first time... will it
  be the last?



He took my number after prolonged internet dating and we had
  several get to know calls before arranging to meet. Now I wondered at this
  point why his voice didn’t seem to match... didn’t quite fit. So, after several
  days of zero communication, I was supposed to hear from him about the time to
  meet after he finished work. Needless to say I heard not a thing. Silence
  followed a very long session on the phone.


Now in the age of internet and text messages I spend less time
talking on the phone. I still like to do it but why call when you can say it in
text, so a long phone conversation is rare but encouraging. Day and place set
then... nothing. I still to this day, over a month later, have no idea what
  happened. He was probably married and looking for a shag on the side. Who knows
  but I should have thought it weird when he was reluctant to exchange details
  but happy to take mine... so my first flirtation came to a screaming halt.



A little disheartened, I decided there was more than one guy on
the site. Perhaps I could give it another go... think again.